Not so long ago, all you could think about in your free time was spending time with your friends, partying , having fun, sharing secrets, spending time together and having a blast. However one night you go to bed and find yourself waking up to a different reality. Almost all of your friends are in serious relationships now (they paired off with someone seemingly all at once) and you’ve become the weird loser that somehow missed the boat.Now what??
Relationships do take a toll on friendships specially on the friend who is left behind.Yes, you can still hang out with your friends and their partners, but at times you can feel marginalised. And it only makes matters worse when you have to listen to your friend constantly talking about her or his new relationship and how awesome it is. It is quite common to have thoughts such as, “There must be something wrong with me” or “I’m not good enough to find anyone”. You may start questioning your value, grow increasingly insecure, or obsess about if and when you’ll find your perfect partner. All this leads you to think that your friendship is taken a backseat all thanks to your friend who is in a relationhip and has no time for you anymore but this is not completely true, somewhere down the line the fact that you are feeling lonely and upset in the company of couple friends also leads to your withdrawal from the group.
So what is to be done to avoid this situation, obviously you cannot stop your friend from getting into a relationship, but what you can do is that instead of stressing about being the only single in your social circle, celebrate it! While it can sometimes feel like being single is a life sentence you’re forced to endure, it’s simply not true.Enjoy the freedom to come and go as you please, by making the most of this extraordinary time in your life.You don’t need an occasion or a person to look good and dress up,channel your inner diva.Let go of any fears or insecurities you hold about being the only single person in the group, allow yourself to enjoy the fun and freedom that goes along with being footloose and fancy free. When you are confident about yourself you’ll never feel sad or lonely in your group of couple friends, infact you may end up feeling awesome beacuse you have no one to answer to, no responsibility or commitment towards another person.
Also the option of widening your friend circle is always available to you, there may be other fun and fabulous singles under your nose that you just haven’t noticed before. Maybe a friendly coworker, neighbor, or friend of a friend. Having new friends by no means mean that you are forgetting or letting go of your old friends, it just means you need to spend some time with single people like yourself at times.
It does take a joint effort to keep the friendship, friends in relationships should also understand the position of their single friends. If you are in a relationship it doesn’t mean spend all your time with your partner.It is very easy for a single friend to feel that once you have got a partner, you don’t need or want them anymore.Its upto you to make sure they don’t feel that way by spending some quality time with your single friends alone sans your partner sometimes.Your behaviour and actions go a long way to prevent your single friend from feeling alone,insecure and sad.
In the end all I wanna tell the single people out there with hoards of couple friends is that don’t let your single-dom get you down when you’re around couples. They’re not trying to make you miserable with their seemingly happy relationships.You’ll also find your special someone at the right time, but till then celebrate YOU and the amazing life you already have.